Services for Young Adults, Adults & Families

Midlife adults are generally 30 to 59 year-olds. This stage of life can feel completely chaotic. Balancing work, relationships with friends and partners, parenting through the different stages of a child's development and managing aging parents, can leave a person exhausted and feeling unfulfilled. Your own needs often take a backseat to your child's.

Is your son going to make friends in middle school or is he going to get shunned for not being an “athlete”? Is your daughter going to get into the college that she has been dreaming about? These can weigh heavily on a parent’s mind and feel all consuming.

As a parent, it's natural to wonder if your child is “maturing” the way they should or if you're doing the “right” things to support them. When things don't go as planned, that uncertainty can turn into guilt, worry and sometimes sadness.

PARENTING THROUGH THE YEARS:

Becoming a new parent is grueling with sleepless nights and no free time. You begin to feel irritable and angry with your partner more than ever before. Postpartum depression /anxiety can feel like being overwhelmed with sadness and fear when you are expected to feel connection and joy. Sometimes you think that other mothers have it “all together” and that something is fundamentally wrong with you for not feeling excited and enthusiastic about your new role. I so clearly remember my son crying nonstop for the first three months of his life. I thought I was losing my mind!

Let me help you like I have helped many other women. I promise it will get better with the right treatment. I feel fortunate to know and collaborate with doctors that can help with female hormones and medications if appropriate. Sometimes you just need to talk about it with a trusting professional.

Babies and toddlers may not be able to talk back yet, but they communicate loudly in other ways through crying, sleep difficulties, separation anxiety, and biting and hitting others. While many of these behaviors are a normal part of development and often fade with time, young children still need gentle and consistent guidance, and age-appropriate tools to help them learn self-control. A dear friend once shared her experience with her three year-old son, whose speech was delayed. Her pediatrician explained that much of his anger came from not yet having the words to express himself, but reassured her that setting clear, appropriate limits when he hurt others was still essential. She later reflected that this guidance helped her do what was best for her son with confidence, free from guilt or second guessing.

When children are in elementary school and middle school, friendship issues and social skills deficits can become apparent for the first time and can feel heartbreaking for a parent. ADHD and/or learning disabilities are often (but not always for inattentive girls) noted by teachers for further evaluation. Girls can present very differently than boys with ADHD and often goes “unnoticed” because she is not disruptive to the class. People with ADHD are smart, creative and like to think out of the box. The school years can be difficult because of having to attend to subject matter that doesn't interest them. However, many people with ADHD become extremely successful adults.

Middle school can be an especially difficult time, as children work to find their place and friendships can shift quickly and unexpectedly. I have a wealth of knowledge, resources and coping tools to help you through this time.

The teen years can be challenging with marijuana and drinking and getting through tough social/academic situations in high school. Not being sure if you are being “too strict” or “too lenient” is hard when so many others have different rules for their teens. Feeling like your child is changing and that you don’t “recognize” them anymore can feel devastating. Often parents blame themselves or each other for their child's behavior. I can help you become a team with your partner to help your teenager, rather than feeling helpless and fighting.

Becoming an empty nester can feel like you’ve lost an important role in your life. Will they be ok? Will I be ok? Now what do I do with my free time? Do I even know my spouse anymore? It's normal to feel like you don't even know your spouse anymore because all of your attention has been on your children. This can be a time where people learn to reconnect and find new things to do with each other. For others, the children leaving the house, gives them the opportunity to leave a relationship that they have been unhappy in.

Mid life is also a stage when many people find themselves going through a divorce or reevaluating their relationships. Some people find themselves in affairs. This can be extremely painful and destabilizing whether you have been cheated on or a long term relationship ends for other reasons. Dealing with money issues, your children’s well being, and your own mental health during a divorce, is more than most people can or should handle alone. I’d be honored to help you find the path that feels right for you. Sometimes well meaning friends and family just cannot be as unbiased as a therapist can.

Women enter perimenopause in their late 30’s and 40’s with no information on ways to handle the emotional/physical turmoil that this can cause. I can help you to understand how that new fear of driving, vertigo, dry eyes and low motivation can all be hormone related and refer you to excellent practitioners in the field of female hormones. I’ve done all the research so you don’t have to (still going through it myself)! It feels so good to be able to help other women during this turbulent time.

Lastly, planning for retirement and anxiety around having enough money to retire someday can be tough. Unplanned or early retirement or job changes can also make this stage of life very challenging when so many people rely on you.

Young adults are between the ages of 18 -30. Although a lot of people assume that young adults are supposed to be carefree and enjoying life, it can be a very difficult transition into adulthood. Young adults can often feel misunderstood and judged by their parents who grew up in a different era. At times, young adults are uncertain about college choices, career paths, and life goals. I have worked with hundreds of young adults to help them gain the knowledge and coping skills to ease the transition from high school or college into the “real world” (PS: it’s never as scary as they think it is). They have the strength inside of them, they just dont realize it yet!

Navigating romantic relationships and friendships can be very difficult when you are young and inexperienced. The pressures of social media to look perfect is hard for both young men and young women. Women's self-esteem can be challenged by comparing themselves to others on social media. Being a young adult can feel very lonely (and the dating apps don't seem to help). If they are struggling with social anxiety or depression, it can feel painfully difficult to connect with others, make new friends, or put themselves out there in the dating world.

Unmanaged or undiagnosed ADHD can make it difficult in college and in new job situations. Undiagnosed autism in women can leave them feeling rejected and wishing others understood why they are so sensitive. Some women with ADHD have pre menstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD) which is a serious mood disorder that is hormone related.

I can help identify the correct diagnosis and treatment modalities both for ADHD and autism. If I need assistance, I know of many good psychologists who administer tests to determine an exact diagnosis and rule others out.

I enjoy teaching executive functioning skills to help people succeed with daily life (“let’s put that in your phone with an alarm to remind you daily of that task”). Finally, I have built a long list of resources for young adults to help with coping skills, job placements, and understanding the strengths and challenges of their unique personality/temperament.

Needing to find "your people" is so important for young adults. Everyone wants to feel like they belong. When people lack connection to others with similar interests and values… this can lead to feelings of hopelessness. Because young adults are still gaining life experience, it can be hard for them to trust that pain and uncertainty won't last forever, and that things can improve with time. This is where I come in to help!

This is also a time when some young people find themselves sliding into marijuana addiction and/or binge drinking There is a lot of shame and denial involved in addiction. This can lead to isolation and potentially becoming unsafe like driving under the influence, ingesting too much of a dangerous drug or suicidal ideations. I have helped many young adults get to a place where they feel ready to acknowledge they have a problem, and finally accept the substance treatment that they need. I have a lot of good resources once this happens to help them get and stay sober.

Sometimes it takes building a strong relationship with clients first, and then when trust is established, I am able to help.

Divorce can be painful for the entire family, especially when the decision was not mutual or when you are trying to separate from someone who has difficulty letting go. During these times, having a knowledgeable and compassionate professional to talk with is essential. I have worked alongside experienced couples therapists and divorce coaches to help individuals navigate this difficult transition in a way that prioritizes emotional safety, healing and integrity.

Throughout the process, my clients gain greater self understanding and clarity about what happened in the relationship, allowing them to move forward with strength, intention and self compassion.

Having worked with children in the past, I also have the unique experience in understanding how children respond to divorce, and can help you to make it as easy as possible for them to understand and still feel loved and seen.

In addition, I can help you to communicate with a co-parent in a way that is healthy for you and your children.

Narcissistic Abuse:

I can work to help support you and give you tools when dealing with an ex-partner who has erratic, mean or destructive tendencies. A person with narcissistic tendencies can make your life very difficult and make you feel like you’re going crazy. Therapy is a place to understand yourself and your (ex)partners behaviors and how to deal with them safely and appropriately. I am highly trained in personality disorders.

Break-Ups can be deeply destabilizing, even if the people were not married. It disrupts a person's sense of identity, emotional security, and direction even when the decision feels necessary. Sometimes you worry, “am I lovable or or will I be alone forever?” Although extremely painful, break ups can become opportunities for greater self understanding and recognition of your behaviors in romantic relationships as well as your attachment style which is usually related to your early caregivers. You learn clearer boundaries around what you want and need in future relationships.

I help individuals identify unhealthy, relationship patterns, recover from emotional abuse, and rebuild confidence and trust in themselves.

Toxic relationships may involve manipulation, gaslighting, chronic criticism, blame-shifting, control, or cycles of intense affection followed by rejection. Often times people will tell me that “everyone loves him…he’s outgoing and loves to impress others.” This just adds to the anxiety that you are the problem. “How can he be so bad if everyone else thinks he’s so great?” This is very common scenario and leads to feelings of despair.

Being in a relationship with these dynamics can make a person feel like a shell of themselves and greatly affects their self-esteem and decision-making abilities. They question every decision that they make and have difficulty believing what their “gut” or inner knowing tells them.

People with strong, narcissistic traits may struggle with empathy, have an excessive need for admiration, react poorly to criticism, avoid accountability, and use manipulation to maintain control. Together, we can explore relationship dynamics, strengthen boundaries, and help you make informed decisions about your future.

Discernment counseling is helpful for individuals who feel deeply uncertain about the future of an important relationship. You may find yourself going back and forth about whether to stay, work on the relationship, or leave. That uncertainty can feel exhausting and isolating. In this process, we slow things down and explore what has happened in the relationship, the patterns that developed over time, and the factors that are making the decision feel so difficult. Rather than rushing toward a decision, discernment work helps you gain greater clarity about your needs, your values, and the direction that feels most aligned for you. The goal is to help you move forward thoughtfully and intentionally, whether that means working toward repair, redefining the relationship, or deciding that it may be time to move in a different direction.

Affair ambivalence is the mixture of emotions that come with being involved in an affair. Some of the feelings are confusion, guilt, excitement, sadness, and uncertainty about what to do next. You feel stuck and both staying and leaving feel impossible. Maybe your affair partner promised you that things were over with their spouse and you believed them. You never imagined that you find yourself in this situation, and fear judgement by others if they found out. You are constantly hiding your relationship and wishing your life looked different. In therapy, we explore these feelings with compassion and clarity, helping you to understand your needs and move forward in a way that feels true to you.

Sometimes family relationships become so strained that an adult child chooses to limit or end contact with a parent. These situations can arise from long-standing, complex, unmet emotional needs, differing values, past hurts, or experiences that have damaged trust. The loss of a parent-child relationship can be deeply painful for everyone involved, often bringing grief, confusion, anger, and sadness. Therapy can provide a space to process these emotions, explore patterns within the relationship, and determine whether health, healing, reconciliation, or healthy boundaries are possible.

In addition, in some families a parent may need to limit contact with an adult child whose substance use, unsafe behavior, or repeated crises, are causing harm to themselves or others. These decisions are rarely made out of lack of love, rather they often reflect an effort to protect the well-being of the family, while avoiding patterns that unintentionally enable destructive behavior. Parents may experience tremendous guilt, fear, and heartbreak during this process. Therapy can help families, establish healthy boundaries, navigate complex emotions, and identify ways to offer support while encouraging accountability and safety.

Family Therapy

Family therapy can be helpful for divorced parents, even when the romantic relationship is over because the parenting relationship continues. The focus shifts from "repairing the couple" to supporting the family system so that children have more stability and the adults can function more effectively in their coparenting roles. This is not always an easy task.

For many people, one of the hardest parts after divorce is not just logistics. It's the emotional reaction to seeing or interacting with the former partner. Old hurt, anger, grief, or anxiety can get triggered quickly, especially during exchanges, scheduling conflicts, or disagreements about parenting. Family therapy provides a structured space to understand those emotional reactions rather than being overwhelmed by them or reacting in ways that increase tension.

In this work, I would help you notice what gets activated in your body when you are around your ex, and develop ways to regulate those emotions so interactions can stay more neutral and child focused. That might include learning communication strategies, setting healthier boundaries, and reducing reactivity so the other person has less emotional control over your internal state.

It can also help shift that dynamic from personal conflict to coparenting roles, which is often a key transition after divorce. Instead of getting pulled back into old relationship patterns, family therapy supports each person in staying anchored in their role as a parent, which can reduce conflict and improve consistency for the children.

Overtime, the goal is not to erase difficult feelings, but to help you feel more grounded, less triggered, and more control of how you show up when they you to interact with their coparent.

Family Intensives

At Nicole Beane Psychotherapy, we are proud to offer Family Intensives‍ for families in crisis to have the opportunity to do deep, focused work over 2 to 3 days, meeting 4 to 6 hours each day. This extended, uninterrupted time allows patterns to surface, emotions to be processed safely, and meaningful shifts to happen more quickly than traditional weekly therapy. What might take months, or even years to address in weekly sessions, can often be meaningfully explored and stabilized in a short period of time, helping families, regain clarity, connection, and direction when it's needed most.

A two therapist model creates more support, structure, and emotional safety during a family intensive. While one therapist facilitates the process, the other can track emotional dynamics, offer additional insight, and and help ensure everyone feels heard. Both therapist are highly trained in different modalities and can provide more clinical tools to help than one therapist alone. Both therapists also collaborate together, which ensures that the intensive works and leaves lasting results.

Family Intensives are good for families in transition from:

*Divorce

*Trauma

*Substance Abuse

*Major Illness (mental or physical)

*Unhealthy Boundaries

*Conflict

*Adult Children Leaving Home (or coming back from) College

*Blending Families

*Siblings Dealing with Aging Parents

*Emotional Dysregulation by Certain Family Members

*Any Crisis Within or Effecting the Family System

*Families that Cannot be Around One Another because of Differing Beliefs Politically or Morally

Family Intensives are more immersive than traditional therapy because they involve extended focused sessions and the coordinated work of two therapist over a period of days. Family Intensives are created unique for each family. This two therapist model allows for deeper clinical attunement, increased structure, and more comprehensive support. It also reflects the time, preparation, and expertise of multiple professionals.

At the end of each family intensive, the family will receive a summary of interventions used and progress made, along with any further recommendations from the two therapists.

Family intensives are also typically done on a weekend which allows for more participation, but also makes it more of a premium service.

Family intensives are more than just talk therapy, but will provide the family with coping skills from different therapeutic modalities. This becomes invaluable to the family and makes it unique.

Family intensives also allow for things to emerge over a 2 to 3 day period that would not normally happen in a shorter 45 minute therapy session. This is why so much work can be done in an intensive. It’s not forgotten about and there is an abundance of time to bring different issues up. Particularly helpful for introverts.